November 97 to September 1998

It's quickly closing in on a year later. I'll start with how I feel now.

I'm much much better. I am not 100%. In April Dr. Kresh felt I had recovered as much as I was going to. I am still in some amount of discomfort all of the time. I think this is due to fibromylgia. Also now my knee, which has always had something deeply wrong with it became a noticable pain. Once you are under the veil of pain it's really hard to tell what's hurting and where.

I spent two weeks (I had a second surgery at the start of the second week) after the first main surgery in bed more or less. Two weeks of soap operas and talk show hosts, I was too tired or sleepy or spaced out on drugs to read. It was just awful. On top of that I got to find out who my friends really were. Maybe they are just self-centered and forgot I had major surgery. I'm still hurt by it in any case. And one friend called who has since died of cancer. I'm very saddened that one of my few true friends has gone. It irks me more that my friend herself in horrible pain had time to call me and others were simply to wacked to bother. This is certainly a disease to find out who your friends are.
I was not always able to work a full 8 hours. I went in for post-surgery checkups one week after each. Healing normally.

Still pretty sore...I was back at work full-time. Really really tired. December was a lesson in limitations and patience.

Work moved toward Betas and shipping....I was still very exhausted but I was beginning to heal nicely. Scars had mostly healed over still a bit red.

Working more, more betas, mostly I just worked and slept.

First checkup since the surgeries. Most pain was gone. Still some muscle aches and very tired. Menstral cycle had only minimal pain. How exciting. I remember sometime in here a friend said to me "You're still looking pretty bad." I said "I'm on the rag." He then exclaimed "No WAY!" So I guess the lack of pain and grouchiness is immensely reduced for me. Probably I wouldn't have left the house if it wasn't for work, and then definately not before noon. (Not that I'm ever an early riser.)

Hey we shipped Flash 3. I wasn't sure at times I'd make it but there it was. I worked long hours and mostly still it was work as long as I could and then go home and sleep for 12 hours.

Well then there's the international versions.. Once those were out I started catching up on my sleep. By July I was starting to feel more normal and wake up after only 10 hours, 8 even sometimes.

I decided in July it was time to start exercising and joined a gym-what a headache, but that's another story. I managed a good workout and yoga class one Sunday and that was it for July. Mind you I also went to Seattle twice and LA. In LA I went to "the" concert of the year, Bauhaus, and you can imagine that was a lot of exercise. Plus traveling is very tiring and stressful.

I was better about trying to exercise. I started going on Tuesdays and Thursdays to yoga class, and that made me feel good afterwards, but every time before I went it was just exhausting to think about. I do sort of normal things now, minus weird knee things-stairs are bad, long walks. I leave the house for fun now. I have a cat to play with now, life is much better. Mid-August, my knee really started bugging me, this had been ongoing but after a second visit to the "Happiest place on Earth" my knee was horrid, and that creaking noise was awful. So Keiko sent me to an orthopedic surgeon, who X-rayed and then did an MRI of it. Problem is that I have a pit on the underside of the patella. Basically a chip on the underside of the kneecap, causing it to scrape unpleasantly across the other two legbones underneath. So now I'm doing physical therapy for a month to see if that alleviates it any. If not, it's surgery again! Oh boy. Though it' would just be a simple surgery to smooth off the rough edges. So twice a week I go to physical therapy, which is not entirely pleasant or unpleasant. It's somewhat painful in that exercise sort of way. September takes me into week two of this.

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